Sunday, September 23, 2012

Thinning the Herd: An Adventure in Weight Loss and Improv




So, I am in an improvised weight loss show called Thinning the Herd. It’s amazing. You should check it out.  So, over the course of the next few months, fifteen of us are trying to lose weight and get in shape all the while making funny twice a week. There will be improv. There will be funny videos. There will be dancing. I love it already, and we had our opening night show last week.

Of course week one, I was the only one to gain weight.That's right ladies and gentlemen, I am currently in last place. For shame!

I told my friend Danielle, and her response was,“But you’re so competitive!”

Now that's competitive.
I know, right? I am indeed very competitive. I have, on occasion, crushed children in games of boggle, my family plays cut-throat scrabble, and I can’t watch college football cause it makes me *crazy*. So, a weight loss competition show should be right up my alley. 

So why the weight gain? I think it was two things really (or like fifteen, but let’s stick with two).

One, I was very stressed out. And two, chocolate is delicious. I think we have covered the chocolate is delicious part before in this here blog, but it really is worth revisiting. And here’s what I’ll say. Chocolate is delicious.

If these were my neighbors, they would be dead.
But my competitive drive has kicked in, and I’m on track now. So, expect to see a bajillion postings about this journey into exercise and eating food made of vegetables.


And dear readers. You will be happy to know that for the month of October, I am committing to posting every day. What? Yes. Every day. And I don't mean "every day." I mean every day. So get ready. Cause I think it’s about time I actually got my shit together.

Kisses,
Jen

Friday, September 21, 2012

New Vocabulary: College Application Edition

Hey there kiddos, here are a few new words care of my high school students and I.It's college application season, so busy busy. And some genius ideas.

Frankenessay (noun) A college application essay that you cobble together from your other application essays, hoping that it makes sense.

Did you write your essay for Duke yet?
Yeah, but it’s a Frankenessay.

Run-on-and-on (to the tune of Mannah Mannah Do do do do do): (noun) A sentence the length of a paragraph, or you know a short novel.

You need to cut that run-on-and-on; it’s like fifteen sentences strung together, and admisions committees don’t like it when your sentences are too long, and they don’t make good sense all of the time--know what I mean? 

Yeah, Like I"m totally sorry, or whatever. 
Apololie (noun) To apologize even though you don’t mean it AT ALL. Often this is clear from your tone of voice. (Thanks Lacy for this one!)

Teacher: Did she apologize to you like I asked?
Student: Yeah, but it was an apololie.